No More Greedy Edy's for Me

Several years ago in Seattle I discovered a wonderful thing called Edy's ice cream. Their "light" ice creams, to me, are just as good as the real thing, and it's the only brand of ice cream I've put in my freezer for about a decade.

A few weeks ago I was shopping at my local Key Foods over on Altantic Avenue in Brooklyn. As I passed the ice cream case I thought about getting a container of Edy's light French Silk. But as I looked through the frosty glass I was taken aback. Some of the cylindrical containers were shorter than the others. They were all Edy's brand - same markings, same flavors - everything was the same except the size. Even the price was the same - $5.99. The smaller containers looked like little mutant ice creams, they were so out of place.

I thought, "No way." I opened the door. Sure enough, some of the containers were 1.75 quarts, and the rest were 1.5 quarts. I double-checked the price: $5.99. No!!! This can't be! Say it isn't so! I knew I was going to be pissed.

Sure enough, I was pissed. First of all, I didn't realize that, all this time, they've been ripping us off with their fancy schmancy cylindrical containers. Ice cream is supposed to come in half gallons. Growing up, I remember ice cream being packed in those rectangular half-gallon containers. Remember those? I didn't realize that the maker of Edy's, (Dreyer's Grand Ice Cream), had tricked us years ago by packing their ice cream into round containers that were 12.5% smaller than the traditional ice cream container - for the same price, actually more. It just never occurred to me to look at the size. Why would it not be a half gallon? Who would do that?

When I moved to NYC in 2005, it took me a long time to adjust to the idea of paying six dollars for (what I thought was) a half gallon of ice cream. Then, all in one blow I find out that I've been paying that much for just 1.75 quarts of ice cream the past few years, and now Dreyer's expects me to pay the same ludicrous amount for another 15% less ice cream?! Are they nuts? Do they think that consumers are that stupid? Like we won't notice?

Oh, oops. I guess we were that stupid with the advent of the cylindrical carton (or at least, I was).

Well, you're not fooling me this time, Dreyer's. I have been a loyal customer for years. I'm done with you and your stupid tricky carton and your new mutant sized ice cream container for the same price. This type of scam is downright wrong. I'm so tired of being ripped off. My god, if it's not the LASIK "surgeon" (I use the term surgeon loosely) or the local so-called emergency veterinarian or the lousy fence contractor who can't tell fpur inches from six, does it have to be the ice cream man? What is this country coming to?

Besides 1.5 quarts is like two bowlfuls for those of us who are serious about our ice cream. What good is that? You want me to pay three bucks a bowl now? Forget it.

Sure, I'd be mad if they'd raised the price of ice cream by 90 cents (that's 15%) and kept the carton the same size. But I would have continued to buy it when it went on sale, as I've done in the past. This is different. This is underhanded. This is a ploy. It's a scam. It's a scheme. It's consumer cruelty. I'll bet that a bunch of overpaid marketing muckety-mucks spent weeks on end in conference room meetings with their Starbucks lattes, pecking away at their Blackberries and making stupid customer jokes while dreaming this one up. I have news for those idiots: Bad idea.

I'm done with Edy's. I hereby officially boycott Edy's ice cream. Forever. Or until the 1.75-quart (or 1/2-gallon) container is reinstated. Even then, I might never go back. I'm just too mad.